Unlock the secrets to true femininity with The Blueprint to Becoming THAT Girl: Femininity, Power & Purpose. Dive into the history of gender roles, biblical wisdom from the Proverbs 31 woman, and actionable steps to embrace your feminine power with confidence, independence, and grace. Your glow-up starts here!
Let’s Talk: What’s the Real Deal with Femininity & Masculinity?
For as long as we can remember, society has been telling us what it means to be a woman or a man. You’ve got rules, expectations, and a whole lot of opinions shaping how we should act, love, and even think. But let’s be real—most of us are just trying to figure it out. So, what if we stopped chasing outdated ideals and started defining our own version of power, beauty, and confidence? If you’re a Black woman navigating this journey, let’s unpack this together.
Where Did These Ideas Even Come From?
Ancient Times: Survival Over Stereotypes
Way back in the day—think ancient Egypt, Greece, and Rome—gender roles weren’t just about tradition; they were about survival. Men were expected to protect and provide, and women took care of the home and community. It wasn’t about power struggles; it was just how things worked to keep families and societies running. But times have changed, and we’re still stuck wrestling with these old roles like they’re set in stone.
The Middle Ages to Victorian Era: The “Good Woman” Trap
By the time the Middle Ages rolled around, femininity became all about purity, gentleness, and submission, while masculinity meant strength, ambition, and emotional restraint. Then came the Victorian era, where women were expected to be delicate homemakers and men were the providers. Society basically told women that their entire worth was tied to being a good wife and mother—sound familiar?
The Biblical Perspective: Women as Help Meets
A lot of these ideas about femininity and masculinity trace back to biblical teachings, specifically Genesis 2:18, where God declares, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” This verse has often been interpreted to mean that a woman’s sole purpose is to support a man, but the original Hebrew meaning of “help meet” is deeper than that. It refers to a strong and capable partner—someone who complements, not serves. The Proverbs 31 woman is the perfect example of this—she was a wife, a businesswoman, a leader, and a provider in her own right.
The 20th Century: Women Start Pushing Back
Fast forward to the 1900s, and things started shifting. Women fought for the right to vote, to work, to have control over their own lives. The feminist movement kicked down doors and challenged the idea that being feminine meant being quiet and pretty. Meanwhile, men started feeling pressure to be more emotionally available, but old-school masculinity still loomed over them. Change was happening, but not fast enough.
The Proverbs 31 Woman: The Original ‘That Girl’
Before social media gave us the idea of “That Girl,” the Bible gave us the ultimate blueprint in Proverbs 31. The Proverbs 31 woman was a true boss—she managed her home, ran her business, and carried herself with wisdom and grace. She wasn’t just about looking good; she was about being good—spiritually, financially, and emotionally. She bought land, she provided for her household, and she spoke with wisdom (Proverbs 31:16-18, 25-26). If that’s not the definition of being a powerhouse, what is?
How to Become ‘That Girl’—Your Way
Being “That Girl” isn’t about following a trend. It’s about tapping into your true self, owning your power, and creating a life that makes you feel fulfilled. Here’s how you can do it:
1. Master Your Emotions & Set Boundaries
Being feminine doesn’t mean being a doormat. It means knowing when to give, when to step back, and when to walk away. Emotional intelligence is key, and sis, protecting your peace is non-negotiable.
2. Own Your Style & Show Up with Confidence
Your style isn’t about impressing others—it’s about feeling good in your own skin. Whether you love bold colors, neutral tones, or effortless glam, find a look that makes you feel powerful and own it.
3. Take Care of Your Mind & Body
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Nourish your body with good food, move in a way that feels good, and protect your mental health like your peace depends on it—because it does.
4. Build Financial & Emotional Independence
The soft life is real, but let’s be clear: being financially independent is a major key. Learn about money, invest in yourself, and make decisions that set you up for success—not struggle.
5. Embrace Your Softness—Unapologetically
Softness is not weakness. Take time to rest, recharge, and embrace your feminine energy. Whether it’s through prayer, journaling, or simply giving yourself grace, let yourself be nurtured.
Final Thoughts: Step Into Your Power
Becoming “That Girl” is a journey, not a destination. It’s about shedding old beliefs, stepping into confidence, and creating a life that aligns with you. No more waiting for permission. Your femininity is your power—not a limitation. And if you ever need guidance, just look to Proverbs 31—because she was doing this before it was a trend.
The Circle of Becoming: Self-Discovery •Becoming • Purpose 
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